Has anyone gotten a good look at Hilary Duff lately? I don’t mean to get all pedophile…oh hell! Sure I do! But damn, she is looking hot! Sure, not long ago she was the Disney tween queen with her bubblegum hits, cherry gloss smile and her so sugary sweet ya get a toothache, films and TV. Now her apple polished image is getting a make-over with her…(cough)..she’s hot…looks, her rocker boyfriend and my favorite rumor, that she likes making out with…more than boys.

Miss Lindsay Lohan, on the other hand looks like she’s trying to ramp up her own reality show called, “America’s Next Crack Whore.” Sure, she stole my heart in “Freaky Friday” and “Mean Girls.” I even did a little rock out shimmy to her pop hit, “Rumors.” But miss teen queen quickly turned to miss backstabbing mean queen. Selling out her friends, becoming a…(cough)…coke whore, and just an all around tramp. Not to mention she’s been looking like she needs her own charity event for malnourished celebrities.

I’m seeing if I can wrangle up Bruce Springstein to do a “Hands Across America” type song to raise funds and awareness to the food deprived celebs like Miss Lohan, Nicole Richie and the Olsen twins. If we all came together as a community we could beat this thing!

Without further delay, we’d like to introduce Chevrolets latest commercial promotion for the 2007 Tahoe featuring:
Lindsay Lohan, Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton in "The Quest for More Blow"

Click image above or this link to view film – nuff said!

Funny part is, Nicole is so skinny she needs to wear a turtle neck in
the summer. To top it off, it was 80+ degrees outside when this photo was taken.

We think that a little meat on her bones would keep her warmer; DJ AM, buy her fine "ass a meal, before it totally disappears.
[popsugar][jjb]

Look at how giant the lattes look in her hands, they are so skinny and frail

We loved the chubby Nicole, remember when you were beyond petite? Gain some weight Nicole, and FYI- we still think your sexy as hell.

We’re announcing Lindsay Lohan, Nicole Richie, Jessica Simpson and Mary-Kate Olsen as our "Most Wanted" Celebs in this Summer 2005 edition. We figure (rouding math) combined they all weigh in at a whopping approximation of 375 pounds gross (94lbs on average each – LOL).

Jessica we estimated weighed in at the heaviest, after all she’s the talles (we gauged her in the 115lb range) with Mary-Kate being as the "runt" feather-weight of the group (barely tipping 85lbs-ish).

Poor Mary-Kate she looks like an insect with those sunglasses on, she needs to gain a few pounds to fill out her sheeks. MK needs a Fatburger in our opinion, not that cigarette.

Nicole Richie also has achieved a fast and furious weight loss regime, we believe she’s shed approx. 12+lbs through her "better diet portion control" methods. Hint- When you see your collar bones protruding = eat more, did someone say eating disorder(s)?

Drum-roll please, last but not least we wanted to strain the point that Lindsay Lohan looks really thin lately, the poor girl looks gd emaciated, not "fit" like her PR claims. We think our words say less than thes two side-by-side pictures – so here she is in her gaunt-Ethiopian Hollywood glory.

We must close with these three words of advice to all the stars that were glam enough to be picket to feature in our Summer 2005 Hollywood Skinny Gang Report,® "Please eat more" ladies. The men of the World want some meat to grab onto, so get some BBQ or a juicy burger – we promise we won’t mind.